How's this for cuteness?

Thank you for your uselessness.

This is an example of some responses I receive when asking for more information about apartment listings:

RE: Ad Interest: Beautiful 2 bedroom appartment for rent on SMB on canal close to beach

Hi Saskia,

unfortunately they don't allow pets at this appartment. It's beautiful though.

Sorry

__________

(spelling preserved for full effect.)

And then later this afternoon I got this one:

Hi Saskia,

The best thing to do is to bring your dog with you when you view the apartments. If you like one of them we can decide whether we would be happy with your dog in the apartment. We would have to take an extra pet deposit to cover us for the risk of damage to the apartment.

7th/8th April is fine to view, let me know what date/time would be most convenient.

Best Regards _____________________

And finally:

Hi there

this place would be ideal for you if you are attending the uni. There are also other students staying in this complex. [YAY!] Unfortunately however, they don't allow pets. [BOOOO.]

If you woul still like to view, please let me know (allow a day or so's notice) and we can arrange a viewing. [Um, seriously? That apartment better be lined in gold/diamonds and come with matching young, hot, Yacht Club Millionaires.]

Regards

___________

(names have been rescinded, since I'm pretty sure I'll catch hell enough from mom for this without telling you yahoos the names of these lunatics kind souls.)

(oh, and those are my comments in [red].)

So basically what I gather here is that I'm missing out on the seriously beautiful apartments due to our pets, and if I really want the apartment I will bring my pet down early. Despite the unbelievably excruciating pet import process. Or maybe FR and I should wait until we get there in May just to let them interview her Ruby who despite all perfection (which I do not in any way doubt) may not pass their inspection and then we can be homeless bums together living in a refrigerator box outside of campus.

Miss Kitty could catch our food for us while we were in class (I've heard iguana is very tasty blackened and then grilled over a garbage can fire). And Ruby can stand guard over our box/belongings.

Thank you, benevolent landlords, for your kind words of wisdom.

Suck it.

Balls of Cuteness and Pieces of Hell.

What the fuck.

Seriously.

Here I am, working my ass off with trainers and treadmills and sit-ups and Special Torture (aka turning away GS cookies) and what does my lovely mother bring home from work today?

These are the good kind, all gooey and chewy and lite on the nuts but heavy on the FAT.

If there is a God, please grant me the strength to resist temptation.

And if there isn't. Well, I'm just screwed.

On a cuter note: how freakin adorable is this Ball of Adorableness?

This is how I trick you into thinking that I care.

I melt your eyes with my adorableness.

This is my Furry BFF Sheila (aka Sheebs, Monster, Booger, Sugar.)

Just after this moment of cuddles, she lept off my lap and left me with a pee spot on my leg. Which I really can't blame her for since her urine sample grew bacteria insanely within 5 hours of creation (aka UTI-mania). She really couldn't help it. Don't be all judgy.

Terror Alert: Code YELLOW.

Seriously folks. Our gov'ner should be calling out the National Guard, declaring a State of Emergency. The pollen count has reached a critical high.

And my poor poor car is just sooooo sad. Normally she shines bright and green and happy. Now she's a dull chartreuse and no matter how many times I wash her she is just COVERED 5 minutes later. Unfortunately I have not been able to convince my parents that it's about time we cut down the Centenarian+ Oak Tree that canopies our drive. Thus, each year, I live with this:

You can see the dust from HERE!

Ack! My nose runs just looking at this!

My leaf collection. I'm pretty sure I could make a whole new tree.

My windshield. Boo.

What is the point of having a sunroof?

The left side of the shot is the part of the window that doesn't get washed by the wipers. The right side shows one day's worth of junk since driving yesterday. You also have a nice reflection of the hateful tree that causes this nightmare.

I have to clean my wipers before I can use them to clean my window.

Sadface Car.

"View" from the sunroof.

Course I don't want to imply my car is the only victim of the Pervasiveness of Pollen. Here are some pics from around the house:

Patio table. So clean you want to eat off of it, right?

Grapefruit tree via a sea of haze. On the plus side, the buds will bloom soon and that is a scent I want to bottle and sniff all year.

Even the dog's water bowl falls victim to those wretched pollen thingies.

Sadface patio.

Sadface Front Porch.

Sadface Railing.

This is just a small image of the amazing powers of Pollen. It's EVERYWHERE. I'm seriously concerned that if enough of it gets together it will learn to combine into some massive Blob-like form and chase me.



The Bane of My Existence.

Oh, and have you ever smelled pollen hanging in the air? It's like the lovely scent of honeysuckle, except that this honeysuckle hails from the 7th Circle of Hell.

On a lighter note, here are some shots of the cutest Ball of Fluff ever. Well, top ten anyhow.

I am not amused by your camera flash.



Bask in my glory, mere mortal.

You can't handle this amount of cuteness. I'm so cute that to photograph me in color would melt your eyes.

I am weary of your attentions. Leave me now. I must rest.

Oh, Hai. Don't mind me. Just checkin out your butt.

And I Shall Name Him George.

I promised myself I wouldn't allow my mind to migrate back to the internet for the rest of the evening, as the quality of my posts dramatically decreases in proportion to how bored I have become with whatever subject I am studying.

BUT.

I came home tonight, about a half hour ago, and thought...let's make a little evening snack of healthy pasta. And I'm standing there at the stove, minding my own business watching the water boil (as an alternative to parasit that is a treat!) when out of the corner of my eye what flies by? A cute, adorable, pestilence-filled MOUSE.

Now, I've never lived anywhere with mice. Well, correction. I've never lived anywhere with mice that make themselves known. This little guy came flying out of the living room and scurried under the fridge as if he owned the place. I really have no problem with the little guy, even started chatting with him (named him George if you must know). Wouldn't you know as my water starts to boil he bee-lines it right under the stove? So of course, I admonish him for being so brutally stupid as to run under a gas stove that is in use when he starts squeaking back at me! And by squeaking I mean the cutest damn noises you have ever heard! I didn't even have to squeeze him first. I'd say it rivaled listening to a litter of newborn kittens screaming for mom.

Back to George. I am going on the assumption that since those squeaks were obviously ones of delight and happiness at meeting me (and not burning hot torture), our new friend Little George is going to hang out in our place for a little while. I seriously debated leaving the little tyke a snicky snack, but thought better of it since snacks have a tendency to attract other creatures of a not-so-beloved kind.

Good night, I am off to study more parasites. And listen out for my new buddy.

He must be Speedy's Caribbean cousin....

Happy Endings.

Seems our little stowaway has been reunited with her owner. The pups name is Baby, and she is owned by a local woman who lives in our neighborhood. In the words of Kristin: "Dog about came unglued when she saw her".

Happy Endings All Around.

Our Little Stowaway.

The good little vet student sits down to prepare herself for the biggest exam of her life. She has her notes and review sheets strewn all over the table, her computer at the ready for researching questions, and her head in the game. Then her phone buzzes with a text message that reads: "Your shower is overflowing and the entire house is flooded".

What is this student to do? Does she just ignore a blatant call for help from her roommates and remain in study mode? Does she pack everything up and rush to the house?

She heads home in the pouring rain, through two major currents of run-off from the mountains to her left, biting her nails at the very image of the damage at home. She runs up the walk to find the front door wide open, an inch of water covering the floors, and four very tired people desperately trying to push the water out of open doors with small mops and brooms collected from neighbors. As an added bonus they are all working in completely darkness stabbed here and there by weak beams of light from various phones and book lights as the power went out shortly after the flood began. She grabs a mop and digs in, feeling the fruitlessness of the effort every other minute as she walks outside to squeeze the drenched mop.

This is how my shower floor looks after every significant rainfall.

Mostly dirt/silt, with some little pieces of food occasionally.

The floors are NEVER that shiny. Taking a break in the humid heat.

It took forever to get rid of all of that water.

Part of this is my clean laundry that hadn't been put away, the rest was stuff off the floor.

Just when the girl finds herself feeling the depths of despair (she desperately needs to pass this exam), she sees movement out of the corner of her eye in the living room. Upon closer inspection she finds a small dog staking claim to the only remaining dry place near the floor – the bottom shelf of the entertainment unit. Initial disbelief leads her to think surly this is a stuffed animal; however the pup turns her eyes towards the girl with a look of utter terror and confusion.

Cristin extending a hand of welcome to our new little friend.

She was seriously terrified. We left her while we finished the house. After all of the commotion ended she came out of her shell and ran around with glee only seen in an animal that has no worries.

The girl asks the landlady (who, along with her husband, are working diligently with us in bailing out the water) if she brought her dog along. When she replies that she had not, the girl and her roommates stare in disbelief at the little pup shivering in their living room and erupt in maniacal laughter at the very thought of this dog finding its way into their home while 5 people are present – and no one has any idea when or where she came from! The girl thinks to herself, perhaps in the midst of this low situation, when most people would quietly lose their minds, this little bundle of fur was sent to our home to remind us of why we are here. Why we put up with the crazy locals and the crappy roads/cars and the flooding showers. We are here to become veterinarians. The rest doesn’t matter. Better yet, the rest matters only in that it will make us better veterinarians for having had these experiences.

Performing a physical exam on our new friend. She's very needy (not Kristin, the dog) and submissive. Loves to sit as close as possible to you - or preferrably ON you.

After two hours of seemingly endless circles, the floors are finally…merely damp. What did the vet student and her fellow mates have to show for it? Wet, stinky clothes, aching backs, beds full of items that were once on the floor, unease about whether the flood water was clean or dirty, and an adorable little refugee to raise our spirits and give us perspective.

Investigagting the surroundings.

Getting some ear love.

Looks a little dark over there...not so sure...

How about I just stay here and let you love me?

I intend to pass this exam tomorrow with flying colors. And the one after that, and after that, and so on…because I intend to be a vet. And nothing can take that away from me.

We decided to toast the evening with a cold drink.

Yes, I realize how unattractive this picture is. No need to comment.

Kristin took this video of the shower beginning its flood. The video is long, but at least watch until the world goes black. That should give you a chuckle.